Missing Him

I am so missing him right now......no matter how we were before, it is so different not having him around.......No one to fight the laptop or the phone over with, no one to disturb me, no one for me to disturb., no one for me to scold and shout at......The house is like so totally QUIET without him-it is like coming home to an empty place.....One thing I regret-not going to send him off [but even if I had gone, his fren wud have irritated me off n as usual, he wud have supported his fren!]
It's only been 2 days and I am like this, how am I going to survive all the way till February? He won't be there for Christmas, for my lil bro's b'day, to tease me when I cry on New Year's Eve-he is gonna be so missed for so many things..........
On the other side-am so jealous that he is gonna be enjoying himself, meeting cousins, going places and most importantly meeting my grandparents-Miss them so much!
But, wadeva, no matter wad I feel, say or write, nothing is gonna change, I didn't get to go during my hols-it is a fact that has been sealed and left to collect dust.......He was lucky enuf to get a chance to go, to have people welcoming him, people who are happy with his arrival, people who didn't give a shit care abt me, people who think that i wud be redundant wherever I go....I guess that is wad my life is abt-People feeling that I am a redundant person who is just using up too much space and breathing up too much oxygen...........


For some reason, I have just been feeling very down lately in terms of -Family, Friends, Relationships, School and Life-Life is seriously just sucky for me at the moment!!!As usual-Parde ke Piche Parda re...[There's a mask behind a mask on every face].

Guess I have to liven up a bit and life and enjoy life while I can, Live every minute while making it a happy wan [said by a fren].
Am gonna try and do so..................We shall see :)