Thoughts

I walk down the lane, with nothing but music for company.

I look around and all that envelops me is loneliness.

At times like this, all I wish dearly is for someone to be there, walking by my side.

One with whom I can just share my thoughts for the moment.

One with whom I can just sit beside, lean my head and doze off / cry as I grumble my butt off.

With all those around me, its just painful that all the relations I have is just breaking by the moment. All the dreams and such that I had of things changing, all just disappeared in the air, without me even realising it..... I got made use of, as ever, also without realising it....

Its just painful with all that is happening, I look beside me, wanting someone to be there, one with whom I can share out all this thoughts but there isn't anyone there.

The worst thing about it all was that I actually thought of just running away and that was favourable to me and later, I was shocked at myself for thinking of just leaving it all.... What about those whom I leave behind....

Thankfully, despite it all, I have music for my company, music being what it is, is always there for me-something I can tune in to and just let it surround me as I block all other thoughts away....

Frankly speaking, I have no idea why I am feeling all these. Things are going smooth but it can be for the fact that the pain from ties being broken has never healed or it can be due to the confusion that has arised in me... Once again.

I have totally no freaking idea as to where my life is headed. I can no longer visualise what I would be doing in the future. The idea of being a HOUSEWIFE seems really really lucrative at the moment ;)