There is a very very weird feeling in me right now...I don't really know what the feeling is but one thing is for sure, it's very DEPRESSING!!!
I find myself growing old....which seriously we are all... but being at home these few months has made me realise the whole process and I feel like there are so many things I wanna just take, twist and Change It!!
Yea there is a kind of bonding but there is also friction being felt so there are both the emotions of happiness and irritateness.......We both are similar in a lot of ways and yet, there are also vast differences such as:-We both are interested in trying new things but whereas I am the type to go online and find the recipe, She recalls the taste and does try-an-error...and it was actually delicious.....
The thing that we are back to back against each other for=HOUSEWORK!!! During this time, I have suprisingly come to LOVE doing Housework but the conflicting thing between both of us is abt getting the guys to do it. Whereas I want them to do a lil bit, at least nothing for the hse but atleast for themselves e.g making their own Milo. Though She oso expects them to be doing a bit but for that, she has to FORCE them, NAG at them and not make Milo from him before he even says it-I know I am being very whiny here but seeing their attitude towards her, they so do not deserve wad she does and all........
To add oil to the fire, going out of the house seems to spoil my mood even more!!
That day, on the way back home in the MRT, I had placed some plastics on the ground. Then when we were a station away, this lady[whose kid had been crying the whole way] gets up and takes the stroller with hr whining kid and heads towards the door. She had to pass by me, and when I realised that, I picked up the plastic bags. Just as I was doing so, she becomes so Impatient that she banged the stroller [the front wheels came up and down] and just tries to make her way through while running over my things!! - Fu*k=I know that you are irritated with your kid but why the hell are you showing your anger to others?? Even others are damn irritated with your whiny kid-She was crying the whole way and that woman couldn't even SHUT her Up!!
Then, another day, I went to Montip to get ear sticks...When I headed to the counter to make payment, the cashier started counting her cash...not wanting to interrupt [having to recount has an irritating sensation] I patiently waited. The damn woman, counted TWICE. I still waited patiently and then, she started counting again! Irritated, I juz said-EXCUSE ME, and I got ignored. Pissed, I literally screamed Excuse Me at her before I got her attention-WTF!!! This is SERVICE?!?
{While being on the topic of shopping, there are hardly people using their own bags even on Wednesdays, despite it being BYOB .... On the other hand, I went shopping with Mom to Tekka and I see an Eurasian lady, going around with four of her own bags, two being filled to the brim wif veg, one being passed to the vendor to put in her purchases and the final was flat and dangling from her shoulders....Comparing her to ourself, there is so much difference! I can't even force my mum to bring the bag whenever she goes shopping, instead I get teases from her and even the two bros whenever I bring it on my own....With tis kinda attitude-How can I even complain abt other not bringing I am unable to FORCE my own family with this habit!!!}
Seriously, everything is so damn irritating!!! The best feeling is only felt when I get off work on Sat and walk through the field filled with groups of family and friends flying kites.....For some reason, seeing the kites in the sky and seeing the group of people, there is a feeling of calmness and happiness along wif a pang of jealousy[well, shall not even bother to go on about it cos I would only be writing lots and lots more vulgarities!]
I find myself growing old....which seriously we are all... but being at home these few months has made me realise the whole process and I feel like there are so many things I wanna just take, twist and Change It!!
Yea there is a kind of bonding but there is also friction being felt so there are both the emotions of happiness and irritateness.......We both are similar in a lot of ways and yet, there are also vast differences such as:-We both are interested in trying new things but whereas I am the type to go online and find the recipe, She recalls the taste and does try-an-error...and it was actually delicious.....
The thing that we are back to back against each other for=HOUSEWORK!!! During this time, I have suprisingly come to LOVE doing Housework but the conflicting thing between both of us is abt getting the guys to do it. Whereas I want them to do a lil bit, at least nothing for the hse but atleast for themselves e.g making their own Milo. Though She oso expects them to be doing a bit but for that, she has to FORCE them, NAG at them and not make Milo from him before he even says it-I know I am being very whiny here but seeing their attitude towards her, they so do not deserve wad she does and all........
To add oil to the fire, going out of the house seems to spoil my mood even more!!
That day, on the way back home in the MRT, I had placed some plastics on the ground. Then when we were a station away, this lady[whose kid had been crying the whole way] gets up and takes the stroller with hr whining kid and heads towards the door. She had to pass by me, and when I realised that, I picked up the plastic bags. Just as I was doing so, she becomes so Impatient that she banged the stroller [the front wheels came up and down] and just tries to make her way through while running over my things!! - Fu*k=I know that you are irritated with your kid but why the hell are you showing your anger to others?? Even others are damn irritated with your whiny kid-She was crying the whole way and that woman couldn't even SHUT her Up!!
Then, another day, I went to Montip to get ear sticks...When I headed to the counter to make payment, the cashier started counting her cash...not wanting to interrupt [having to recount has an irritating sensation] I patiently waited. The damn woman, counted TWICE. I still waited patiently and then, she started counting again! Irritated, I juz said-EXCUSE ME, and I got ignored. Pissed, I literally screamed Excuse Me at her before I got her attention-WTF!!! This is SERVICE?!?
{While being on the topic of shopping, there are hardly people using their own bags even on Wednesdays, despite it being BYOB .... On the other hand, I went shopping with Mom to Tekka and I see an Eurasian lady, going around with four of her own bags, two being filled to the brim wif veg, one being passed to the vendor to put in her purchases and the final was flat and dangling from her shoulders....Comparing her to ourself, there is so much difference! I can't even force my mum to bring the bag whenever she goes shopping, instead I get teases from her and even the two bros whenever I bring it on my own....With tis kinda attitude-How can I even complain abt other not bringing I am unable to FORCE my own family with this habit!!!}
Seriously, everything is so damn irritating!!! The best feeling is only felt when I get off work on Sat and walk through the field filled with groups of family and friends flying kites.....For some reason, seeing the kites in the sky and seeing the group of people, there is a feeling of calmness and happiness along wif a pang of jealousy[well, shall not even bother to go on about it cos I would only be writing lots and lots more vulgarities!]
Seriously, it gets tiring at some point.......
Sometimes, the loneliness gets to the point whereby one starts questioning their reason of existence.
At other times, though being alone, seeing a kid smile at you, makes one willing to go on...to witness the day whereby that happiness is blessed upon them oso!
And yet, at the same time, witnessing death scenes in TV or however, really hits one hard.....
Life is full of certainties, happiness, sadness and lots of other feelings....Everyone goes through different phases of Life and experiences different kind of happiness and challenges awaiting them in life.....In the End, whatever is ahead of us is unknown to one and all therefore, the only thing that we can do is to continue walking into the unknown future and take on all the challenges, problems and all boulders to get to the finishing point of our lives.....
Sometimes, the loneliness gets to the point whereby one starts questioning their reason of existence.
At other times, though being alone, seeing a kid smile at you, makes one willing to go on...to witness the day whereby that happiness is blessed upon them oso!
And yet, at the same time, witnessing death scenes in TV or however, really hits one hard.....
Life is full of certainties, happiness, sadness and lots of other feelings....Everyone goes through different phases of Life and experiences different kind of happiness and challenges awaiting them in life.....In the End, whatever is ahead of us is unknown to one and all therefore, the only thing that we can do is to continue walking into the unknown future and take on all the challenges, problems and all boulders to get to the finishing point of our lives.....
It's a different future that we had envisioned....but, it's Life's surprises that keep it interesting.
Learning how to make the most of the unexpected events make us STRONGER-Tsuda Masami
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